lonelyI knew that loneliness could be painful, but last week I learned that it can actually be dangerous. Steve Conner wrote an article in The Independent, published February 16th, about a survey conducted by the Mental Health Foundation. Here are some quotes that caught my attention.

“Feeling extreme loneliness on a long-term basis can be worse than obesity in terms of increasing the potentially lethal health risks that lead to premature death,” scientists said.

Chronic loneliness has been shown to increase the chances of an early grave by 14 per cent, which is as bad as being overweight and almost as bad as poverty in undermining a person’s long-term well being, a study has found….

Professor John Cacioppo, a psychologist at the University of Chicago, said there are dramatic differences in the rate of decline in physical and mental health as people age and that these can be linked to the number of satisfying relationships people continue to keep with friends and relatives as they get older. … ‘Retiring to Florida to live in a warmer climate among strangers isn’t necessarily a good idea if it means you are disconnected from the people who mean the most to you,’ he told the American Association for the Advancement of Science….

“Chronic loneliness is linked with higher levels of the stress hormone cortisol in the morning, which raises the risk of heart attacks and strokes. Loneliness is also linked with higher blood pressure and a weakening of the immune system,” Professor Cacioppo said.

Can you believe it? That article is saying that loneliness can actually kill us! The problem, of course, is that loneliness is all around us. Maybe you live alone so that you often cook a meal for one and watch TV by yourself night after night. Even if you don’t live alone, you know that having a lot of people around doesn’t always solve the problem of loneliness. We all know what it’s like to feel very much alone in the middle of a crowd. We can turn to entertainment, but that is only a temporary distraction.

Even married couples can feel very alone even though they share the same house and see each other regularly. Then too, heartbreaking loneliness can be triggered when a spouse is absent because of death or divorce. The types of loneliness are endless, but if it can actually shorten our lives, then it is even more vital that we find a solution. Maybe that’s part of the reason Solomon said, “Two are better than one because they have a good return for their labor. For if either of them falls, the one will lift up his companion. But woe to the one who falls when there is not another to lift him up” (Ecclesiastes 4:9–10).

I believe that we all struggle, at least some of the time, with feeling isolated and alone. Even the great scientist Albert Einstein said, “It is strange to be known so universally, and yet to be so lonely.” Great and godly men like King David have also experienced times of painful loneliness. At one point, when David was hiding in a cave for fear of his life, he lamented, “Look to the right and see; for there is no one who regards me; there is no escape for me; no one cares for my soul” (Psalm 142:4).

Let’s get right to the core reason why we experience so much loneliness. We are all born with an emptiness inside of us that only God can fill. God made us to have fellowship with Him. As Bill Gothard put it, “Loneliness is the evidence that I was expecting others to meet my needs as only God can.” You and I both exist so we can worship and enjoy the One who made us. Only God can cure our lonely hearts. “My soul, wait in silence for God only, for my hope is from Him” (Psalm 62:5). Those of us who know Him can testify to the joy His presence brings into our lives.

We don’t have to endure prolonged times of loneliness! In fact, it’s possible to be physically alone and yet not be lonely when we are focused on God and experiencing His presence. Having a personal relationship with Him provides a genuine companionship that we can take with us wherever we go. “Loneliness is an opportunity for Jesus to make Himself known,” F. B. Meyer said.

If you are a chronically lonely person, if the title of this article caught your eye for that reason, I want to invite you to Bethel Chapel Church. Our main worship time is at 11:00 AM on Sunday morning. Please talk to me after the service. We are a place where you can find out how to have a personal relationship with Jesus Christ, and also a place where you can form friendships with others who love and worship Him. God has made a way for you to leave your killer loneliness behind.

Let loneliness drive you to find the fulfillment that only God can give you. God Himself promises that, “You will seek Me and find Me when you search for Me with all your heart” (Jeremiah 29:13).